Co-Dependent, Independent, or Interdependent?
- Dependence says, “I need you.” It’s the paradigm of “you.” You take care of me; you come through for me. You didn’t come through for me; I blame you for this problem.
- The next level is independence. It’s the paradigm of “I.” I can do this, I don’t need you, I’m responsible; I’m self-reliant. I don’t need anyone.
- On the other hand, interdependence is a healthy combination of the two. It is a paradigm of “we.” Interdependence is a realization that life works better when we are involved in healthy relationships with others. Interdependence says we can do this, we can cooperate, and we can combine our talents and abilities and create something greater together than we could alone.
God created us to live in community. The very first thing God pronounced as not good is in Gen. 2:18 when He stated, “It is not good for man to be alone;” therefore He never intended for us to do life alone. God created us in love, for love and to be loved. We can blame our lineage, parents, grandparents, or our environment at any given moment…a spouse, a boss, a coworker, children, teenagers, health, financial issues…these are responsible for my situation and my misery. “If it wasn’t for this, that, or them…things would be just fine!”